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Mongol Rally

So my friend Kyle is doing the London to Ulaanbaatar (Ulan Bator) motor relay race- and I could not be more jealous.

So jealous I don't know how much of a post I can write. I want to go to Mongolia so bad- but doing it in an adventure format like this?! My problem is I never just have enough balls to up and do it.

Maybe when I get a second wind later I will post more, but until then... it is a neat event-- crazy overland race in crappy cars- they also have one they do in Africa. They also have an awesome Mongolian derby done a la horse back which reminds me of a story during the heyday of the Mongolian empire which exemplifies the efficiency of the empire of the day:

The Mongolians were basically sitting outside the hills of Vienna (sensing they didn't want to conquer anymore) and a diplomat asked for them to take him to their leader as fast as possible. So they put him on a horse and sent him riding. Every so often they would come to a switching post, and they would switch him to a new horse and a new companion- but he didn't get to stop. I believe he rode for three days straight like this until he reached inner Mongolia with a sore butt to be sure.

Mongolian efficiency for ya.

Here is the race website:

And here is Kyle's website for their team
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Reasons I Hate LA

Let me count the ways...

This list could be infinite.

Sometimes when I see a movie in theaters I really like I briefly consider becoming serious about acting again. I was in this frame of mind after seeing a certain nerd-tastic movie recently, until my brother called. We were sitting around watching reality tv (celebrity apprentice being one of my dad's favorite past-times these days) and we paused the TiVo to listen to the EP McGee on speaker phone- another McGee family tradition.

So he's doing a contract job for a small production house which will remain nameless even though you have never heard of them anyways. Basically they are incompetent, and colossal doo-doo hit the fan and they blame the nearest person for all of their troubles. Now, I stick up for family- but when a family member does something inappropriate or wrong in a business setting, i have no qualms telling them so. In this instance, however, my brother was in no way responsible for their incompetence and lack of brain power and foresight. Not only does scapegoating just irritate me, but the general lack of self admission of guilt in this instance- which i feel is rife in the production community, drives me insane. That is why I left LA. I am not taking a fall for your stupid ass decisions. There is a reason I am not surprised the famous Producer I worked for in LA hasn't made any of the projects we were working on back in 2005/2006.

It is hard to convey in words the loathing in every sense of my being I feel for these idiot production types whose sole purpose in life it seems is to make everyone else's life miserable.

Basically after that conversation with my brother- and how miserable these idiots were making him, i realized, or rather remembered, LA sucks.

I guess if you are talent the situation is different. You are separate from the annoying silly head games and backstabbing of office producing by your agent who deals with those idiots for you and keeps you isolated- if they are any good at their job. The actors and/or directors usually seem to have a good time doing it- but man- even my sister's good friend who was a VP at Dreamworks finally quit because he couldn't take the incompetency anymore.

I loathed having to take the blame for idiotic decisions which in turn would reflect poorly on me even though my idiot boss had made the bad choice and it would effect MY career path. "you have to work your way up Alana". Having things thrown across the room and verbally abused on a daily basis is not anything that anyone should put up with from an employer. "everyone puts up with behavior like this". bullshit- if they do they are just as stupid as the people they are working for. I met a couple decent producers when I was there who didn't treat their underlings like crap- but they were few and far between. I had the power to totally screw my producer over had i wanted- they should understand that and treat their employees like human beings. Carrots rather than sticks. I don't think they understand that concept because they are too self absorbed.

What I hate about LA is the mentality that behavior like this is acceptable, and even standard. The world does not revolve around you, get over yourself.

I also dislike the people in LA. Maybe not all, and this is a generalization, but I once dated this huge black rapper trapped inside the body of a 5'6" Jewish kid from LA who lived across the street from Elijah Wood. He got kicks out of pee-ing on elijah's car. seriously? I know this kid still, and like him, but really?

The moment I knew i had to get out of LA was when I was training the kid who was going to take over my position for the producer in Eisner's old teak lined office. He was more obsessed about box office gross then anything actually happening in the world of consequence- that and he called Scarlett Johansson 'fat'. I almost punched him. He was not good-looking and was not allowed to call her fat- i'm sorry.

The only way I could live in LA- would to be were my brother lives in Santa Monica. In a bungalow surrounded by Lemon trees 5 blocks from the beach- possibly dating or friends with Nathan Fillion, Zach Quinto and NPH.

I heart Fillion and Quinto- so pictures of them!
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More Camper Kids Shoes

These are just too cute!
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Nim Chimpsky

So on the plane last night I finally finished reading the Nim Chimpsky. For some reason recently I have been drawn to reading books about animal consciousness and our relationships with non- human beings. The book I recently finished before I picked up this one was called Animals Make us Human by Temple Grandin. While she touches on the consciousness of cats, dogs, avians, and horses, what Grandin is known for is her commentary on the relationship of humans with food animals and the slaughtering process. I found it fascinating how she developed more humane ways for slaughter industries to employ certain techniques that didn't cause undue stress on the animals. Something as simple extending the floor beneath the cow as it is hoisted up on a conveyor belt solved tons of issues and mental distress on the animal- thus striving ever closer to be more conscious of our decisions and how we treat the animals around us makes us more human in the fact that we acknowledge suffering, even among members of other species.

I would be a vegetarian if I could, I like the concept, but those of you who know me also know that is incredibly unlikely, for the sole fact that I just LOVE bacon.

I maintain that if there were 4 incredibly sentient species on earth, Humans, Chimpanzees, Dolphins, would likely be the first three; and Pigs would be the fourth.

Anyway, the book is called Nim Chimpsky after the chimpanzee that bore that name. His name, as you may have guessed, was a play on the ever famous Noam Chomsky, who believed and argued that language was a solely human trait- and no other being could use language to communicate. Chomsky said many things, and is beloved by many linguists, anthropologist, political activists and philosophers, but i think Chomsky is homo-centric on this issue- meaning biased; and that in itself is a four-letter word in anthropological circles.

Arguments are made that language can mean many things, but as dear old Noam defines language acquisition:

children are able to learn the "superficial" grammar of a particular language because all intelligible languages are founded on a "deep structure" of grammatical rules that are universal and that correspond to an innate capacity of the human brain.

Chomsky directly refutes that any other species is capable of use or understanding language. Anyone who owns a dog of even mild intelligence has cause to be skeptical. What Project Nim, although deemed a failure by its creator, set out to do was to prove Chomsky wrong; that non-human species can communicate with humans, and in our own language no less.

Oversimplified, Nim was deemed incapable of language because he couldn't form proper English syntax. Neither can my 3 year old niece. Would she consider her incapable of language?

While Project Nim (Nim as a baby in NY on Left) was a failure, and incredibly sad in hindsight when you look at the experiment through a modern perspective, the creator of the experiment wrote another anecdotal book about his experiences with Nim, which all but confirm that Nim indeed could use language to communicate his wants and desires.

It is a fascinating story, not just about Nim, but about how the pharma and scientific community treat their research animals. And when you realize that these animals have the same fears, wants, desires, emotions, and needs as you do, it becomes a very sad and painful story.

I don't think I ever really realized how sentient other beings really are. I always thought my dogs understood much more than they could communicate back to me- but scientifically how do you separate anthropomorphism from actual communicative ability in an animal that cannot communicate in English with you. ( I secretly think Duff speaks Norwegian) When you realize how 'human' they can be- with all anthropomorphism aside- straight from the lips of the chimp in question when he tells you he doesn't like watching that tv channel, or using sign language and pointing at a picture in one of his albums of a girl he knew from his childhood signing, 'she smelled like apples' you have to second guess your standing in this world.

Nim's is a sad story, but one to be learned from. Grandin also i believe has a chapter about Chimpanzees that have 'outlived their usefulness".

Her stories of "chimps who have outlived their usefulness' is interesting in that she also recounts stories of these chimpanzees and where they are now living in hybrid situations. Not entirely comfortable being a chimpanzee, and not entirely comfortable being a human, these pseudo chimps (the lucky ones) live in refuges where they have their own rooms with television sets they operate on their own, and access to the outside where they can manifest their more 'chimp' like nature.

The one story that sticks in my mind is of Cheetah from the Tarzan movies. Chimpanzees after about age 4-5 become much too strong and often aggressive and are usually discarded at this point because they cannot be used for tv and movies- that often means to medical laboratories who have ways of handling adult chimps. Cheetah however managed to land himself a nice hybrid situation like the one described above. He knew how to switch cassettes in the vcr and would often put in movies of himself and get excited when he came on screen- and show these scenes to guests when they came over. Sounds like something any actor proud of his work in his first film might do.


anyway, i recommend both Nim Chimpsky and Temple Grandin's Animals make us Human. If you have read Michael Pollen's Omnivore's Dilemma, this is the next logical step.

By the way I always found it amusing that Pollen wrote a book called Botany of Desire. How fitting


I also found this post on the institute for humane education


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Twitter Cont.

This is the graphic I like, the whale just looks so Happy!

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Twitter

I don't really get it. I mean I do- but really? This is like the 21st century Version of IM. Been there- why would I want the whole world to know what I am doing at any hour of the day. Do I want everyone to know I am playing solitaire at work, or worse...

It is like an open forum IM post with the world. It's an insta-blog. An insta-blog with shitty servers that constantly crash. Granted I do like reading Rainn Wilson's posts- man that guy has nothing but time it seems to come up with hilarity. And Dr.tiki. If you don't know who either of those individuals are. Shame.... SHAME ON YOU.

This, however, has not stopped me from opening up an account, and one for the MuShoe- so the whole world can read our tweets about shoes.

Levar Burton is in on the action. AKA awesomeness. And I thought about following Brent Spiner's tweets- but after reading a few, I decided that is a mentality I don't want to contaminate my bright sunny days. I can't tell if he is joking. If you don't know who that is, don't bother, it'll just embarrass me.

Man I do love their graphics however- genius- my favorite of the server crap out ones is a bunch of blue birds helping a whale fly. too cute- I want a t-shirt of it.

This is what I got when I tried to Follow Jermain Clement of Flight of the Conchords. If you don't know there stuff- I highly suggest you youtube it. I'll post a few of my faves of theirs soon.

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For the Love of Dogs

Because I love doggies.....

http://today.msnbc.msn.com/id/30088069?GT1=43001
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It's that time of the year again

And what time of the year is that?

The "almost" summertime which means Summer of Alana is about to begin again.

The time of the year that when I have down time and try to post here about the hilarity of things going on in my neck of the woods- wherever that may happen to be at the moment. I will actually make a goal of trying to post every day to keep all you actual working stiffs entertained.

So Welcome!

We'll see what gets my attention later to write about!

currently I am eating grapes that were much too close to the freezer part of the mini fridge in the back of the store, and wondering if it should be a "champagne friday"?
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